Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Boy is Curtis gonna be mad. The whole story of Raggae week is coming next. it turned into a hilarious chapter. wait til you read this.

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Monday, April 27, 2009

The Fire dept is at my house if you drive by and see it but I am fine. a powerline went down and caught the neighbors yard on fire

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Sunday, April 26, 2009

orlando Volleyball







I took Tyler to Orlando for the final vb tournament. Her team did well. Thet got the Gold and went on to the semi finals and placed third. Out of 44 teams. Wow. They play a lot of games Sat and Sun. We went to City Walk Sat. night and after the Sunday games we had time to go to the outlet mall and use the gift cards we had from Christmas. Thats were I snapped the shot below on my phone.


I think they partied too hard at Universal. I have no idea who they were but i couldnt pass up the shot

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Monday, April 20, 2009

Its still a Frightening Road


Every ache, Every pain, every non normal tick......makes you wonder...my body is still out of wack...I wonder if I am gonna be here ....I get scared and want my life back. I used to plan the future..now I plan the future and pray that I am still gonna be a part of it.

I will fight anything else I am faced with but carefree is gone....A worry is always in the back of my head....when I pay for Tyler's Volleyball for the summer...When I ask about the kids future plans..........when I think about losing the weight from chemo.....

..I want the chance to be me again....fear of the unknown sucks.......I know that no one has a guarantee but if I had this once....will it come back? is it somewhere else?...aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.

I try to be my bubbly self..but inside I am on fire......sometimes....not always....

I will just try too take the best care I can.....of myself. exercise, healthy diet, stress relief.......

Radiation is 4 more weeks.....My White count is up and down and some days I feel great and some I feel poopie...lethargic and drab. so I sit down and try to take it easy and then ...everyone wonders why the floor isn't mopped...or why Mom isn't doing the dishes....the clothes...the floor,,,,,the patio....the grass...the pool.....the fryer........the blah blah blah...well its not always gonna get done...........the kids know it and help out...thank you kids especially Tyler. She is very cool. I am naive..NOT.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

what it is


Radiation therapy involves delivering radiation to the breast to destroy cancer cells. Radiation therapy works within cancer cells to make them unable to multiply. When these cells die, the body naturally eliminates them. Healthy tissue is able to repair itself in a way cancer cells cannot.

Friday, April 3, 2009

second time XXX







No Beams YET. This is the second stage of the set up.

Don't be a chicken





during Radiation...stay out of the sun...with exposed BReast...ok I can do that...and don't be a chicken...OK I can try that...





Meet the Nurse or Radiation Tech

OK Roger has like perfect eyebrows...I have eyebrow envy...I call him Roger Rabbit.
I think I love him.....
He is smart and warm and teaches me my KEYWORDS!
Thank you Roger Rabbit



Roger Seeks and Destroys Any an all cancer cells that Get in his path...Get em Roger...Get em

Denise the exotic dancer, with the dark hair, was the first person I met at Baptist Radiation Oncology. She took me through everything they would do and explained in detail what was going on. She has a huge bright smile to match her professional personality. She makes me feel comfortable and that she is in control. I think I love her too.

Blondie Brows is Chariss and if she wasn't one of my main techs, I would have asked for her to be. I see her as a woman that takes her job serious and mistakes are not permissible.....but she can take a prank as well anyone....and return one in an instant...
I bet I love her as well.
These are the Nurses at the "Station".....why do they call it that...are they waiting for a train?
Yanexis the Vampire is the Transylvania. He parents are Counts and she draws blood with great sex appeal.
Martha and Roxana are the Dr. Phils of radiation...you need to talk? go by the station....you looking for a lost spouse? go by the station...You want the Doctor?... go by the station. You need a Drink?....Go by the station and pick them up and go to happy hour.
I love the man that lost his wife in the building.

Radiation is no big deal.....except for getting there on time everyday, the noise the machine makes and the lights that flash in your face....if you are a clubber you'll like it....yea uh Maybe NOT.
I have gone 4 times this week. First two days I met everyone and had some more x-rays done. So more people got to see me half naked...I am growing fond of exposing myself to strangers.....that's gonna be a problem later in life....Then twice I have actually received the radiation with x rays. The Xrays are to prepare the machine to put the beams in the exact same CORRECT place each time I get it..I don't know how they know where to put the beam unless they see the scar tissue in the Xray. The ribs that show up in the Xrays place the beam in the correct place as well. missing the lung is vital for the health of lung tissue.
A marker is placed on the area that abdominal area to measure the breathing pattern. A laser measures the patter and only delivers the radiation beam when I exhale as to miss the inflated lung tissue. It is very hard to control the breathing during the treatments. Taking the Yoga Classes helps you control the breathing and the panic the machine can create mentally.
There is no feeling during the treatment. You only know whats happening because of the noises. It actually may be that I know what the machine is doing because of my knowledge of the equipment. Unless you are in the medical Field, you might not even realize whats the machines are doing. That, in my opinion, would be better than knowing. To me, the anticipation of the
knowing when the beam is coming, makes breathing regular a bit of a challenge.
Anyway, I feel like I am all over the place in this description of whats happening and in my head, that is how it is being processed. Maybe the photos will be more of an organized story..
I don't see any marks on my skin, and I feel nothing in the area they are zapping. For now. I am using aloe religiously and as often as I can stick my hand down my shirt and not offend any one. I may stop the not offending anyone though as time goes by. Haha No radiation on weekends....just happy hours...
This is my rendition of the radiation process and my understanding of what the treatment is doing. If you are or know someone who is having it, it will be different but basically the same. If my statements are wrong or need to be corrected, I hope you let me know. I would hate to have the wrong info on here and in my head.